Shock Absorber

When you hear shock absorber, I bet what comes to your mind first is that which prevents you from feeling the jolts and vibrations whenever your car moves on a bad or rough road. Or when your car is making sudden breaks, or cornering.

However, this is not all that there is to say about shock absorbers. Of course, a mechanic or someone who uses a car will definitely say that the role of a shock absorber is to hold the car tyres firmly on the road and provide comfort for every ride, but have you thought about shock absorbers responsible for comfort and stability during your life journey?

What holds the tyres of your life, preventing them from sudden vibrations or skidding off the road into a pit or trap? What gives you comfort in your life journey? What is your shock absorber?

Is it your monthly salary or that job that ensures you receive alert often? Or is it your husband or wife who earns more than you and ensures you never lack? Or is it that philanthropist who you are certain was specifically sent to you? Is it your parents' wealth ? Perhaps it's your hustle? 

Your answer could be anyone of the above but do you know that money which is a general factor in all of the above isn't totally a guarantee of total comfort or joy? Yes Godly riches comes without sorrow but have you ever been in a situation where you received a credit alert  on your phone but are not satisfied and still want more? That should tell you, that money doesn't totally or always  give comfort. 

What or who then should you consider as your shock absorber? When you suddenly find yourself on rough edges or when you find yourself trying to balance your ride, what do you rely on or look up to? What about when unexpected things happen?

The answer to these questions, you already know. Sometimes we know the power of something but we downplay the power, thinking that it is no big deal or it isn't as serious and potent. 

God is your only sure shock absorber. You must never downplay the power or hold of God over your life or journey.

Not only will God guarantee your comfort and safety. He will also prevent you from getting lost or struggling. Especially when you encounter sudden vibrations, potholes or a shaking.

N-power: Questions the Federal Government Needs to Answer

The travails of the average N-power volunteer can not be overemphasized. From battling with difficult bosses and PPAs to dealing with missing or delayed stipends. It is clear that the Nigerian empowerment programme is not for the faint hearted.  The minister in charge of the ministry of humanitarian affairs where Npower has been moved,  Sadiya Umar Farouq , has just confirmed that about 12000 beneficiaries are being owed their monthly stipend. It is nor that she was willing to make this declaration as she had earlier said that all volunteers had been paid. However, the uproar on social media had become deafening.

It is quite sad that steps are only taken to improve or correct the situation of things in this country, only after overwhelming complaints have been reported across the media. More disheartening is the fact that sometimes, this doesn't work as well.

In the midst of all these, it has been announced that the first two batches of the program should get set to be exited so that a new batch can come in. But there are several questions that needs answers. Is a new batch at this moment the best idea? What about current volunteers with a backlog of no payments? Are the problems with the program already solved before a new batch is invited in? Is it fair that batch A volunteers spent 3years in the program and batch B can't? What about all the promises made by the government concerning a transition plan?

Speaking on Monday during the briefing by members of the Presidential Task Force on COVID-19, the minister said, “As far as the ministry is concerned, we have paid N-Power beneficiaries that have been verified and recommended for payment. We have 500,000 N-Power volunteers.

“Those who are claiming that they have not been paid, we are looking into these issues with the Office of the Account General of the Federation.

It is disappointing that despite government's promises to provide device for the second batch of the program. No volunteer belonging to batch B has received their device. Why were batch A beneficiaries, given a device but there seems to be no hope for batch B? Will this batch be given their devices later? What is the transition plan for these volunteers? Are they returning to the society unemployed again? Has the N-power project truly fulfilled it's purpose? These and many more are the questions begging for answers before a new batch is signed on.

Can We Put An End To Rape?

Nigeria, and a lot of African countries have an extremely low conviction rate for rape and sexual abuse. Despite an increase in violence in women in recent years, a lot of rape victims are still made to go through the pain of watching their attackers go scot free.

An human rights lawyer who has been handling sexual assault cases for over a decade, once said, some cases are not effective enough, because some instances of rape are not recognized in the eyes of law. Sometimes, after medical examination when no signs of force or bruising is seen, the law does not recognize that as rape.

Sadly, everyday, more children, and females especially are being molested secretly by both people known to them and those unknown to them. How can this evil be battled?

Rapists must be Convicted

Enough of government taking issues of rape with levity. Once a rape case is reported, valid arrests must be made and investigations completed. Once a rapist has been identified, he or she must be made to face the law. If we are corrupt and always distorting the law, we must make an exception for rape cases. Law enforcement agents must stop allowing rapists get away, we never know who their next victim is.

Parents and loved ones must know their children

I have heard a couple of ladies lament that when they were first raped, their mothers never believed them when they reported the incidence.  Also I have heard a lady lament that her mother was too insensitive, to notice, that she was being molested by her uncle who was always visiting and making her seat on his laps.

Many hold a serious  grudge against their parents today because their parents were to busy, insensitive and careless to know what was going on with them.

How busy are you as a parent? Are you too busy to look at your daughter while talking to her? are you too busy to play a game or have a meal with your child? Are you too busy to seat with your child and chat ? Make amends.

Teach Sons to Respect Females; Teach females How to Act Around Males

Everyone has a son, a daughter, females or males around them. We all must endeavour to teach them respect and ethics. Teach the boy that he must never beat a girl. Teach the boy that he must respect everyone including the female gender , teach the boy and the girl that they are never to force anyone to do anything against their will. Teach the girl how to behave around the opposite sex, teach the girl boundaries and how to set them. Teach girls to avoid being alone with the opposite sex in an enclosed place. Teach boys to control their sexual urges. Teach boys and girls to speak out when someone is stalking or hurting them. Raise good men, raise happy women and heal the world. 

We can end rape. We can have a society where anyone will be scared to rape or lie that they have been raped because they know that the long arms of the law will catch up with them and they will be made to pay. It appears like a long shot, an impossible feat but we can try. We can achieve it if we believe it. We can get it if we enact it.

Women For Liberty Africa (WFLA) held her first whassap webinar on the 3rd of April, 2020. The speaker Abigail Dantzie, is a sexual assault transcendence coach, helping the abused find their power, rise above their limitations, be better, do better and live freely.

Her mission is to alleviate suffering by bringing healing to the hearts of the wounded souls of many, enlightening and supporting them to access their power and reclaim their vision and live a more abundant life of health, wealth, happiness and success.

Her expertise stems from experiencing years of serious exploitation, surviving it and understanding how it affects individual's lives.

 She also has several years of experience in coaching, speaking internationally, holding workshops and teaching people how to transcend difficulties to better lives. 

She has the essential skills needed including self-awareness, empathy, non-judgmental, understanding and many more.


Her goal is to create positive impact in the lives of the innocent victim where they realise their value, use all their gifts and talents and transform into the beautiful person they were born to be. She can be reached on Phoenixtranscended.com. Follow her on twitter @phoenixtranscen and Instagram @phoenixtranscended


Seminar Topic: Surviving the effects of lockdown during the coronavirus pandemic


There are several tools to maintaining our sanity during times as we are experiencing in the world currently. One of the tools is recognizing that we are powerless.


Recognizing powerlessness, means that we recognize that we only have power over ourselves and not over everything. Sometimes we end up making a mess of situations because we think we have d power to control such situations. We must recognize that we do not have power over all things. We must not fix our minds on the problem or things we can't control.


Another tool is acceptance. Acceptance can help us to deal with many situations. Accepting that we are powerless over things happening around us, as well as accepting who we are also helps us to relax and let go of any worries.


Another tool is letting go. Letting go, allowing ourselves to feel and recognize that we have no control over things is a way we can make progress during difficult times. Letting go helps us to stop fighting people, places and things.


Letting God in.. God can help our weaknesses, especially since we can't do everything on our own. We also can't act like God therefore we must not try to take on the responsibilities of God. We must however embrace love. Love supercedes all things, if we can learn to love we can overcome anything.

Having the right mindset..what you think about, you bring about. If you focus on d problem you will be drawn more into the problem.

Fear...we must eliminate it. We must think of how to make things better not think of negativity.

Gratitude...we must be thankful and grateful in difficult circumstances. We must find something to be grateful for even when we don't like what is going on around us.

Forgiveness.. Forgiveness brings freedom, freedom from the past, freedom from resentment and pain. Avoiding resentment helps us to break free panick and ailments.


We can practice meditations. Meditations help us to build a great mindset. Remember that mindset reprogramming is necessary. Ask yourself - "why do I always feel sad, terrified or thinking the negative?" This must stop.

 Practice a good healthy routine of prayer, mediation, reading, exercise  and healthy eating.

Feed the right wolf, that is your faith, peace, love and kindness. Then all things will work together for your good.

You can practice meditation and relaxation by:

Putting your feet flat on the floor while sitting

Resting your back

Breathing in and out and

Speaking positive affirmations.

Some positive affirmations for this season are:

All my loved ones are in the hands of God
My life is in God's hands
All power is God's
I give thanks that my day is beautiful
I am grateful for my life and health.
I will not be a partaker of evil

You will find yourself handling difficult situations better if you hold on to this tips.


You can follow women for Liberty Africa's online activities on IG @womenforliber
On Twitter @womenforlibertyAfrica and in Facebook @ women for liberty Africa

A Fruit President Story

Once upon a time, in a land where fruits were not just edible but audible, a president had to be chosen. The date for a presidential election was set and Tromp the big Orange, Binion the teary onions, Paul the hard pawpaw, Benny the soft berry, Alp the proud apple, and Hannah the sweet banana all decided to run for president.

You can't be bored!

I know you are bored especially with the new stay at home rule, but what kind of boredom are you experiencing? Are you so bored that you are becoming depressed and/or unmotivated to do anything? Or are you so bored that you want to do something to bring you out of that mood even if it means creating something stupid?

Last night I thought within myself, 80% of individuals will go to sleep tonight and then wake up tomorrow morning to go through the same routine again. It is the season of Country lockdown and the routine for most people is simple - Eat, Work from home( for some), take care of the house, cook( for some), Spend hours on the phone, Sleep and Repeat.

The act of hanging out and/or having unprotected sex is not even safe for those who engage in this anymore at this present time. Some really close friends are even practicing social distancing, what could be more awkward than your friend telling you not to visit at the moment. Of course many are grateful for the gift of life and for good health but this restriction to movements abd social distancing is no longer funny.

Amidst all the funny memes and skits created on social media to alleviate panic and give comic relief this period, a funny meme appeared on my WhatsApp status recently which really cracked me up but still sent a message. It read :

"Notice from Psychiatric Society"

"During lockdown, it is normal to talk to  plants, pots, pans and things. Contact us only if you hear their reply"

 As funny as this is,it drives home the fact that a lot of people may be mentally or psychologically affected by this compulsory stay at home and social distancing. A lot of people may be affected by the fact that they have to remain indoors and practice a routine that they have never been used to all their lives. A lot of people may become bored and not know what to do about it.

It is true that some people will get their needed rest and relaxation. For some it means that you will finally know who cares about you, for others it means that you can have more family time and you can try out new skills but are you immune to boredom? Do you know that there are levels of boredom? ever heard of Apathetic boredom? 

Apathetic boredom is usually characterized by a lack of interest in life activities or interactions with others. The individual becomes so bored that he or she can't maintain relationships and enjoy life.

Everybody experiences apathy from time to time. There are times we feel unmotivated or uninterested in daily tasks. This type of situational apathy is normal.

However when Apathy becomes frequent and uncontrollable, it is a symptom of several psychiatric and neurological disorders. Some of which includes:

Alzheimer’s disease, Huntington’s disease

Parkinson’s disease, schizophrenia, stroke

Etc

Boredom can drive one to the brink of insanity, at the same time it can birth creative ideas in individuals. It all depends on how you experience it.

Boredom can be a destructive feeling, leading people to depression yet in certain circumstances, boredom can be a force for good, something that starts a creative process or something that leads to greater self-reflection.

Boredom is an emotion that is underrated despite its being common in today’s society. I hope that in a time like this when the world is faced with plagues which has forced many to remain in seclusion, we can channel our boredom, and isolation from the outside world into something great. I hope that we don't become people who suffer negative effects of boredom but rather people who bring out the good from sour situations.

What I think About Gabrielle Union's "Welcome to the Party"

Apart from the fact that the beautiful and ageless Gabrielle Union and her daughter, Kaavia James, have stolen our hearts from the start, we enjoy seeing their cute and hilarious moments together on Instagram. Now that Kaavia has inspired her mother to write a children's book, you can be sure of one thing, the book, "Welcome to the Party",will be an outpouring of affection and a mother's love. 

Live healthy with Fruttanuts Nigeria Limited

 Fruttanuts Nigeria Limited, located at 2 Limson estate, Ojodu Berger, makers of GingerUp(120ml), GingerUp(500ml), GingerUp(satchet) and GingerUp jam(premium quality) have assured that their products which contains Ginger, Honey and water is NAFDAC approved and it has a whole lot of health benefits.

Benefits  of Ginger Up

1. Helps relieve digestive issues
2. Promotes detoxification
3. Relieves menstrual cramps
4. Fights colds
5. Natural Antiinflammatory
6. Speeds up the rate of metabolism
7. Improves Blood Circulation
8. Relieves Tooth Ache
9. Promotes Detoxification

Ginger Up is available in supermarkets on the island and on the mainland. For more information contact the company on:

Telephone: +2349082229999

Instagram: fruttanuts_gingerupdrink
Facebook: Gingerup Naija
Website: www.fruttanustnigeria.com

8 Wonderful Ways To Celebrate Christmas

Christmas is a beautiful time of the year. It is that time of the year when everyone wants to be at their best. The season of giving and receiving. There are several ways to celebrate and enjoy this beautiful season. See ways one can enjoy Christmas below:

1. Have a friend or family reunion

Christmas is one of the best times to get every member of one's family together. What can be more wonderful than spending your holiday with your friends or family, especially the ones you hardly have time to visit  or have not seen all year round.

2. Take time to reflect

Christmas is when most homecomings and reunions take place. You can take advantage of this season to relax and look back at how you have fared all through the year.

3. Pray or go to Church

Going to church to give thanks,  going for musical concerts and praying are also ways to celebrate this season.

4. Give and show love

Just because this season preaches love and it is that time of the year when one can't get enough love, it gives greater joy when we show love and keep spreading love. 

5.Christmas carols

Carols are happy or religious songs, usually sung at Christmas. The great joy and gladness that comes with attending or partaking in carols is one that makes even the hardest of hearts melt. Christmas is almost incomplete without carols.

6. Avoid Conflict

No matter how pushed we get during this season, we must learn to avoid conflict. We must not destroy the solemnity and gladness of the season by being enveloped in conflict.

7. Remember what Christmas season is about

We must make conscious effort to remember what christmas really is. It isn't an end of the year routine celebration or a religious routine celebration. It is a celebration of love and kindness.

 8. Take a Vacation 

You and your family can go on a beautiful vacation trip to a place you have always wanted. There are usually discounted travel packages at this moment as well.

Christmas time is meant to be filled with gladness, merriment and thankfulness. To have a memorable Christmas, one must be intentional. Carve out time with family and friends to reconnect with one another. Do new fun things, visit a new place. Don’t let the month go by without recording really memorable moments.

5 Life lessons to learn from Tissy Nnachi's "Don't Leave Home"

Directed by Tissy Nnachi, Nollywood movie Don't Leave Home was released earlier this year and it stars talented Nollywood acts Bimbo Ademoye, Adaora Ukoh, Daniel Lloyd, Lilian Esoro and many more.

Not only did this movie tell  a touching story, it exposes the deep effects of external influence on an individual. In this movie, a pregnant woman naively allowed a stranger into her life. This stranger came under the guise of 'I am also pregnant' and of course she offered friendship and was able to penetrate into the latter's life.

It is true that pregnant women experience a lot of emotions in this state. The various hormones being secreted in their body places them on a emotional rollercoaster which can explain why they may act gullible. This however isn't enough reason to let their guards down and become easily brainwashed.

So what are the lessons to be learnt from this movie:

Lesson 1

- Never let your emotions control you

Run things, do not let things run you

Lesson 2

-Old Friends are Diamonds

Ever heard of that song, Old friends are diamonds, new friends are gold? Which would you to chose to keep if you had to pick?

Lesson 3

- Do not reveal all about you all the time

Is it possible to always keep really personal information within you? What is it with women and the need to spill out everything happening in their lives to friends? Sometimes some information are better hidden or kept within.

Lesson 4

-Listen to your life partner

Some women may not agree with me on this but the institution marriage, kind of comes with some rules and regulations. A lot of people will avoid unnecessary headaches and problems if they can listen to advise from their life partner.

Lesson 5

-Never leave your home

This is for married people. Except you are in an abusive relationship and your life is threatened, do not leave your home. No matter the challenge, no matter how bad the situation is, do not leave your home until you have been able to prove beyond every reasonable doubt that it is the best option.

Finally, Karma is real and it is a known fact that everyone will reap whatever they sow, even if it takes time.

More pictures from the movie:

A life changing experience

A couple of months ago, I passed through one of the most unforgettable experience of my life.

As humans, we are bound to go through different experiences daily and in our entire life. Our life is a sum total of various situations we have passed through, circumstances we have found ourselves in and what we have learnt from these things.

  However there are experiences that cannot be forgotten and that are of course unique to us.

By now I'm sure you want to know what this is, anyway, it is something usual, I gave birth. Bringing another human to life isn't such a big deal for some people at least that was what I thought until I had to go through it. My honest conclusion is, experience is the best teacher.

It is true that when you do certain things, your life changes forever. Becoming a parent is one of those things. Becoming a parent can be a wonderful experience but at times, it can be daunting and overwhelming as you begin to make decisions about a lot of things that may be quite new to you. Some new parents suffer from postnatal depression unaware, especially if they have little or no helper around. It is therefore expedient that one avoids venturing into the business of having children when one is not ready.

 For those already on this journey, good luck and God's grace to us all. For those looking forward to start the journey, grace and courage to have a wonderful experience from the start.