Atelophobia

There is this thing about feelings of self respect and regard, this same thing is what makes it possible for praise singers to make money from singing praises of individuals, this same thing makes it possible for beggars or party drummers (Alagbe) to get tokens. This feelings appeal to that emotional side of the human mind, that part of the brain connected to self worth and of course it makes you feel good, having a feeling of importance, self worth makes one feel really good. I wouldn’t necessarily call it self esteem but then it is something like it. This same feeling must definitely be responsible for the constant urge to succeed and be perfect. So yes we all have the tendency to be atelophobic but of course at different levels and intensity.
The first time I learnt about atelophobia, I realized this is a phobia that can affect anybody no matter your class or status. It’s the fear of failure or being imperfect, funny how one can have an extreme or irrational fear of or serious aversion to imperfection. The idea of imperfection is subjective in the sense that sometimes only the sufferer can detect imperfection in a situation while those around may not see it. Why should anyone feel obliged to be perfect at all times?  Sufferers of this phobia become anxious when they fail at something or don’t do a task well, they are constantly faced with fear of criticism , not matching up to expectations and they think that not being perfect will make them unhappy. When faced with thoughts of imperfection the individual experiences physical symptoms, headache, elevated heart rate, increased respiratory rate, sweating and generalized muscle tension. Believe me this is real. Unfortunately sufferers are mostly known to be intelligent and smart but the perfectionist and obsessive nature of their personality dominates thereby making them susceptible to this phobia. Worse still is the fact that this phobia is majorly born out of the sufferer’s thoughts and the symptoms and effects appears when these thoughts of not having a perfect idea or not being able to act perfectly in a situation appears.
Psychologists have traced its causes and roots to childhood and parent upbringing in some people. Most of us that were born in the 80s and 90s will bear witness of the fact that our parents always drive us to do more to ascertain perfection. Some parents keep comparing their children with others who seem like the perfect model, sometimes at occasions when it seems we’ve not acted ‘well behaved or perfect enough’ our mothers make faces at us or call us names or in some cases beat us when we get home.

All these are recorded in the cognitive domain and psycho motor domain. This increases the feelings of self consciousness in some people and the unnecessary quest to be perfect at all times. Truly our mothers had good intentions but then the brain works in funny ways. For other people its criticism, have you ever been terribly criticized such that you cried? Yes constant negative criticisms can be a fertile ground for atelophobia. It’s like a personal flaw which the sufferer battles secretly.


Having said all these, we all have personal flaws; no one is perfect or seemingly angelic. We all are human beings and we do not always know which way to go.  I am not saying we shouldn’t seek perfection in the things we do, but we must not make it an obsession, even patience is regarded as a Godly virtue. Things do not always happen the way we want it, but atelophobic or not, if we can just take life easy and calmly, setting priorities and achievable goals as well as practicing consistency against all odds or challenges, we will overcome and definitely reach our desired goals..

Comments

Unknown said…
This is a great eye-opener! Thanks for a great article wel written. Love it and sharing this as well! Kudos!
Ayoola Iwayemi said…
Thank you Ponmile.
You are very correct, some people lack self confidence or esteem because of what their parent or people around called them in the past.... It takes self and personal discipline with deliberate action to change this
Ominous Red said…
I struggle with severe Atelophobia. Thanks for writing this article.

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